I am so very tired right now. Iím supposed to go out to dinner tonight but I just want to go home and sleep. I have no idea when Iím supposed to clean my house before my guests show up or do my laundry or finish my Christmas shopping. Iím out of time. I hate running out of time. As much as taking the bus to work has helped me out it has also created a whole new set of obstacles.
Iím getting sad. I donít want to be, and I have a lot of good that I should be focusing on, but Iím only seeing the dark sides of things right now. I have deadlines up the wazoo for Big, I havenít even started Christmas shopping, mostly because I have no money to shop with, I need a haircut so bad it isnít funny, I havenít been to the gym in forever, Iím just not happy. I just need to get through the week. Actually, I need to get through New Years. And I really need to clean the house. I know thatís bothering me more than Iím letting myself think. I really need to put a whole mess of stuff into that cardboard box and put it out for CP. Including all those clothes in my room. Keep the good dresses to sell, but everything else just out for donation. Then sell the damn dresses already. I am so lazy sometimes.
I do really like my new icons I put on my desktop. Little Dinosaurs walking across the screen make me smile.
Ok, so this next part is totally boring and mostly just for my own reference to keep me from forgetting, so please feel free to skip if you so desire.
I donít really expect to get all of this done in the next day and a half, but I want to see how much I can get done and have the rest in writing so I donít start to ignore it again. I really want to get rid of all the leftover crap. Ideally I would like to slap a fresh coat of white paint on the walls, too. They just look sad right now, especially the empty bedroom. It wouldnít take too long; the place isnít that big, as long as itís good paint that really covers well.
It has suddenly gotten very quiet at the office, but I canít leave until 5 because, well, a. I didnít get here until 9 this morning and b. Iím the only one left and someone needs to watch for scary email until the end of the business day. I just know four documents would come in at two minutes to five if I left early.