I feel like I�ve lost track of something but I can�t figure out what it is. It�s just this vague nagging at the back of my brain making me think I�m forgetting something very important but not giving me any clue as to what it might be. I hope I come up with it soon because this is driving me nuts.

My sister is going to highlight my hair for me tonight. If she remembers, that is. I�m also supposed to see my cousin�s band with her afterwards. I�m not sure I really want to go, though. I like the band and all, but I�m really worn out and I have a lot of prep work to do for load in Sunday, so part of me feels the better part of valor is to just go home. I�m thinking of trying to get some of the work done while I�m waiting for the dye to take, if I manage to get a certain amount done, I�ll go to the first set and call it a night after that. The only thing is they aren�t going on until almost 11, so that will still get me home pretty late. God, I feel so old.

I keep telling myself I�m just worn out and need some sleep, then everything will be better, but I don�t really think that�s it anymore. I think I�ve been holding this elevated stress level for so long at this point I don�t even realize it�s there anymore, but it is still sapping my energy without me knowing. Sort of like when the alternator on my car was in the process of frying. Everything seemed fine, but the alternator was slowly sucking the life out of my battery and not putting any charge back, so my poor car was just getting less and less work from more and more effort until it finally just ran out of reserves. I just compared myself to a car. First sports metaphors and now this. What am I becoming here? Look away! I don�t want anyone to see!

Anyway, my point is that I think I need to take better care of myself because I think I�m starting to tap into the last of my reserves here. I think starting yoga again is a good first step, now I just need to prioritize that enough that I don�t let the rest of my life bulldoze right over it. I let that happen with kickboxing sometimes and I�m never a very happy person when I have to do that. Sometimes it�s worth it for a week or two (as in the One Act Festival) Other times it�s not (stupid non-rights getting theater). I think I need to start making a point of putting myself in the forefront for a little while. If it means telling a few people I will be late to one tech rehearsal on occasion, I really don�t think that will be the end of the world. Especially in the instances where the theater is 10 minutes from the dojo, meaning I will be a whopping 1-1/2 hours late. Speaking of kickboxing, I did a very nice spinning reverse crescent kick in my garage yesterday. I�ve been working on that one for a while, so I�m happy I�m starting to see progress, still no luck on my Iron Broom though. I still keep falling on my butt when I try that one. All in good time, my pretty.

I have recently decided I want to learn how to play the harmonica. Yes, tangent, I know. Anyway, I have decided this and now I need to find someone to teach me. I thought about just getting a book, but I could never really learn music that way. I really need to hear it, especially at the beginning, so I can know what to aim for. I thought about asking my cousin, but I�m not sure I want to get into that position with him. Mixing family and teaching et al never really seems to work very well. Sort of like becoming roommates with your best friend, it just never seems to work out. Also, I don�t think music works the same in his head as it does in mine. It�s very intuitive for him, he picks it up very easily and just sort of knows how it all goes together. I can�t see it this way, so it always takes me a little longer to get it. I�m afraid this will be a problem as far as teaching/ learning styles go. I think I need to find someone else is the bottom line. I also need to find the time, so this flight of fancy may have to wait awhile.

Speaking of which, I need to go now. Bye bye.